I'm not dead, I swear. I'm just a lazy asshole. I was going to post this whole thing yesterday but my intricate and frankly incredible drawing in Paint somehow disappeared and I lost the will to live.
Instead, I offer up this mini-post that is mainly comprised of a photograph which terrified me to the depths of my soul and made me think of Amber, because her fear of spiders makes my own seem like an insignificant sort of mild dislike, rather than the violent, hysterical phobia it is.
So, sorry, Amber. But this is almost certainly your own fault. Every time you blog about spiders, one appears in my home. This is merely the age old tradition of a cluster of eyes for a cluster of eyes: